It’s no secret that I am a fan of Tila Tequila, and not just because she once linked to a piece I wrote about her shoddy treatment by a certain rotund gossip columnist. Although that and the fact that she Tweeted a nice compliment about my writing doesn’t hurt.
I’m not really a fan of her music which is actually quite listenable if you like pop music but being a Diamond Banger of old it just isn’t my thing. And although I have been accused of simply liking “hot chicks” at 38 I’ve seen my share, many in person, and with age comes the jaded wisdom that almost any women can be “hot” and what’s more important is that a person be interesting. Which Tila Tequila is in my opinion, but even that isn’t why I’m a fan.
No I’m a fan of the Tila Tequila industry, the way Tila Nguyen used the Internet in what was at the time a novel way to build herself up into one of the most iconic American figures of the 21st century.Tila Tequila captured the spirit of the times and was the first to embrace, and fully utilize, web celebrity. She’s changed things, for the better in some ways and some may argue for the worse in others, but she has left her stamp on history as surely as Charles Baudelaire or Alice Cooper.
Tila Tequila seized fame by the throat and dragged it to her while the gate keepers of celebrity, the self-appointed taste makers, could do nothing but wail at their own impotence and insignificance. This makes her unique among all the supposed stars of today and that’s why I’m a fan.
It is also why I was slightly surprised to see Tila Tequila cheap shotted by Paul Heyman, the failed wrestling promoter and professional douchebag who now makes a living running The Heyman Hustle which I think is in some way affiliated with British tabloids, but frankly who can tell? I’m sure that too will collapse like everything else he touches.
Heyman a.k.a. Paul E Dangerously is himself best known for taking the old Extreme Championship Wrestling promotion from obscurity into legend by doing things differently, by changing the very expectations of wrestling fans and that influence can be felt to this day. Not having the business acumen of Tila Tequila, Heyman squandered his success, and the good will of many of the people working for him, by bankrupting the company. Now fans of the 90s phenomenon can watch the WWE dig up the old ECW’s corpse and sodomize it on SyFy every Tuesday at 10:00.
This too is the legacy of Paul Heyman.
But back to Heyman’s cheap shot. While running some pictures of Tequila walking down the street the unlikeable Heyman and his new merry band of soon to be screwed over employees made a little funny:
So, we get these photos of Tila Tequila (heavy breathing commences … now!) and she’s walking by a parking meter in Los Angeles. Our own Hustler De Tuti Hustlers Paul Heyman says “has the time expired on that parking meter yet?”
Of course, we took the bait.
Yes … how did you know?
“Because that bitch’s 15 minutes is waaaaay up!”
Says … Paul Heyman?
Paul Heyman was sort of a proto-Tila Tequila in the 90s. He was Tila without the Internet, sex appeal, and ability to run a business. His destruction of the company his ideas helped make legend is well documented, as was his poor treatment of female talent (like selling video of the infamous Kristina Laum striptease when he promised the performer he wouldn’t even tape it) which I assume helps explain why Heyman would be anything but enamored with the Tila Tequila brand, if not the person. Tequila has surpassed Heyman in that after making a splash she was able to keep afloat, something Heyman has still never proven he can do.
Which is probably the point. Heyman has had his 15 minutes of fame several times over and at least 45 minutes of it wasn’t worth seeing and all have basically led nowhere. Tila Tequila turned her 15 minutes into a career and in doing so altered the pop culture landscape in a way even Heyman’s ECW has not.
When I first started blogging I was actually doing a Sci-fi/Wrestling blog (no longer safe for work!). There I blogged about indy circuit wrestlers like the unfortunately retired Kayla Sparks and wrestler turned fetish icon Tara Bush. Both these young women did what hundreds of bands, wrestlers, models, and other performers having been doing since Tila Tequila became famous, and that’s putting all their promotional efforts into social networking sites and other web-based marketing. Advertisers are throwing money into the web with reckless abandon and the Internet has launched hundreds of careers, and I myself have sold Tila Tequila merchandise to finance Red Alerts on more than one occasion. Tila Tequila’s “15 minutes” are responsible for much of this.
Unlike anyone who’s worked for Heyman,Tila Tequila can be counted on to generate profit. For better or for worse, she has inspired a whole new class of celebrity and a new model for doing business that has had far reaching consequences for thousands of people. Heyman cannot say the same, but he can claim her 15 minutes are up. This is wishful thinking on the part of a man who assumes he’s more important than he is and is irritated seeing a woman do better the thing he almost did well himself. Is this misogyny? Maybe, maybe not.
But hating Tila Tequila has become popular these days, as the outrageous comments on her recent Global Grind piece illustrate. Too popular for it to be explained away. The venom aimed at her is almost as bad as the venom aimed at Sarah Palin, and often by the same people. Like this YouTuber whose channel is set up to mock Trig Palin. She left this comment on a video with Tila Tequila. A video, I might add, that was made to support the oppressed people of Burma:
Tila wouldn’t know her pussy from her asshole if there wasn’t a dude ramming one of them everyday and telling her they are loose as fuck and she is washed up. Bet she smells like fish sauce and poo.
Classy right? But vulgarity aside how different is this from Heyman publishing his insult/fantasy of Tila Tequila being more insignificant than him? Not much if you ask me. Both are seemingly envious attacks on someone who will be remembered as an innovator in this industry, and both are attempts to degrade Tila Tequila and her accomplishments. This sort of behavior should be beneath both, but it isn’t.
Maybe both will have a change of heart 15 minutes from now.
