The New Misogyny: Tila Tequila Called Whore for Doing Charity Work

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Call me old-fashioned but I’m not big on calling women “whore” or some permutation of the word, especially women who are trying to do something good for someone. To me the only time it might be appropriate to make such a reference is when a woman has done something especially horrid, like Shana Brown, a woman I happily referred to as a gutterslut when she was caught drugging her 13-year-old daughter so her boyfriend could rape her.

Outside of that level of depravity I think it’s disgusting to call a woman a slut or whore. I don’t care if they are Internet models, porn stars, strippers or the girl you know who is cheating on her boyfriend, it is immature misogyny to call a woman a whore simply because you happen to not like or approve of some facet of their life. It is a crass and unmanly position to take in all but the most extreme circumstances.

Shamefully there are those that disagree and happily attempt to degrade any woman that draws their petty ire. During the ’08 elections I wrote about adult film actress Gauge suffering outrageous personal attacks from her “fans” after writing what was essentially Republican boiler plate about supporting John McCain because she was pro-life and pro-Second Amendment. In that case there was a hypocritical element to the attacks because she was abused with comments like this:

Hey Gauge, I just watched a video of you fucking 5 guys. Please tell us again how wrong irresponsible sex is. I’ve seen a lot of your work but you never had the guys wear condoms. Don’t you think it’s irresponsible to engage in unsafe sex? How many STD’s have you had? Considering how big a skank you are, I bet you’ve had a lot. Well since your boy McCain is crashing and burning, I can’t wait for the election. Obama is going to win in a landslide.

This of course from someone who watches her movies. This liberal, as I said on that post, viewed women like Gauge as de facto sex slaves who perform deviant acts for their pleasure and aren’t entitled to be anything more that a girl on a DVD doing things that are marketed to people whose self-loathing and anger makes them want to see attractive women degraded. I don’t like modern pornography, which has replaced hedonism with humiliation and decadence with degradation, but the people who attacked Gauge are fans of that. They are the ones who should be ashamed, not Gauge.

Now in a similar incident Tila Tequila was apparently called a whore by “Perez Hilton”after pictures of her in lingerie and a trenchcoat showed up on gossip blogs. The rotund celebrity parasite didn’t provide his emotionally stunted followers the context for these photos apparently. It seems the world’s most famous Internet model was raising money for a breast cancer charity:

Think what you want of Tila Tequila, and I happen to think she exemplifies Capitalism and American exceptionalism as I’ve said before, but here’s a woman taking time to help the Keep-a-Breast foundation and while doing that she is called a whore by not just a narcissistic star-stalker but by the rabble of ne’er-do-wells who seem to travel from website to website calling this person who they’ll never meet and will have no effect on their lives vile names. My question is why?

There’s an essay by Anton LaVey (I think it’s in The Devil’s Notebook but I’m not sure) in which he examines misogyny and comes to the conclusion that the misogynist is competing with women for male attention, and his anger derives from his failure to win that competition. Using such now eyebrow raising phrases as “closeted homosexual” for men like this he implies that they are predominantly stunted people who live in a permanent state of semi-girlish pre-adolescence. With the ever more misogynist pornography, attacks on female political figures and and the abandonment of the ideas of womanhood being something to respect I think this essay has become more important than ever.

Were this simply a spat between two celebrities this story would be meaningless but Perez Hilton’s brand of envious misogyny has become an acceptable stance for men to have regarding women. One need only check the comments on some YouTube video or article that allows comments to see men partaking in what is essentially gender specific class envy where women like Tila Tequila are claimed to be deserving of abuse simply because they are successful.

The same jealousy and misanthropy that drives class warfare drive the hatred of pretty, rich and famous women who a large segment of our society believes are “whores” for simply living their own lives. That would be bad enough itself but in this instance a woman doing a good deed, one that anyone who has the opportunity to do should do, is being attacked for no other reason than that it is now acceptable to treat women poorly in our society.

Call me “Conservative” but I believe in respecting women, even ones you may not agree with. I don’t believe in infantilizing women by any means, I think respecting a person means treating them as individuals equal to yourself, but I simply won’t accept that it is O.K. for a man to call a woman a whore simply because she has a photo of herself in lingerie when she’s basically a lingerie model. I don’t think it’s acceptable to encourage degradation in porn by buying the mot extreme forms of it, then claim adult film actresses are skanks for working in the industry which you created. I think men should reserve name calling for the Shana Browns of the world, not women who are simply minding their own business.

I’m not a misogynist. I like women, even ones I disagree with, and think that all are worthy of respect. But it seems that this is a minority view these days.

Update: Welcome Tila Tequila fans! Due to a surge in traffic to the site, comments are taking a few minutes to appear. Please be patient, and thanks for reading.

173 thoughts on “The New Misogyny: Tila Tequila Called Whore for Doing Charity Work

  1. Should I put in my two cents and comment on a person at home in the middle of the day calling celebrities whores? It’s a cliche but why don’t you get a job?

  2. I am happy to see that some people still view people for who they are and not for what pictures portray of them. Definitely a rare breed if ever I’ve seen one… Thank you so much for your view and for speaking out against those that seem to further their esteem by degrading other’s more successful than they are. ….. Great article! Someone needs to speak up and not care about impending ridicule. No matter who the person of the hour is that is getting the negative press, it is important to not lose sight of what really matters. Stars are people too! They have feelings just as vivid as everyone else. They deserve the same respect as you and I and it’s great to see that there are people that share that view with us “common people” 🙂

  3. This was a ridiculous sexist manifesto.

    “It’s not women’s fault for taking naked pictures! It’s men’s fault for appreciating it!” is basically the message of this article. That is like blaming the downloader for downloading illegal copies of music, and not the provider. The problem will never be stopped until the source is cut off.

    How did this even become published? Women lose respect for their intellect and wisdom when they instead ask for it for their breasts and bodies.

    Look “whore” or “slut” up in the dictionary, please. “A promiscuous or slovenly woman,” is the definition mine gives me. Look up promiscuous. My dictionary says “having many sexual relationships, especially transient ones.” Would that not apply directly to porn stars? Other celebrities like Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan?

    Men are going to enjoy one night stands, but it doesn’t make it a respectable thing to do. Men are going to enjoy strip clubs, but it doesn’t make it a respectable thing to do. If you’ve had a bad day and come home and someone offers themselves to you to be beaten, saying they don’t mind, you’re likely going to do it. What would you do if that person then reported you for assault? It doesn’t make sense.

    Furthermore, Tila Tequila is bipolar. A few symptoms of bipolar disorder: sexual promiscuity, desire for attention, engaging in risky and dangerous behaviors and sexual relationships.

    That fits the definition for slut and whore.

    I doubt she cared if she was helping charity. I bet she woke up one day and decided she wanted to show off her tits, so she booked the first thing she found.

    I will respect women that deserve my respect, such as Emily Bronte. JK Rowling. Sarah Palin.

    Girls expect excuses to be made for them, and it’s pathetic. “Well, the boys like it!” is the lamest excuse I have heard since grade school. I can’t say I haven’t taken and / or sent my share of inappropriate pictures, or engaged in an act or two that would be considered promiscuous – but to actually think you should get respect for that is preposterous! I knew what I was doing when I did it. I knew the consequences and the situation for what they really were. It’s amazing to me what a delusion a majority of these female stars are living in. I think Perez Hilton is trying to make people realize this – that Tila Tequila and Paris Hilton actually think they’re being respected and earning real fame for being exhibitionist of their bodies.

    They’re not.

    I am not envious of their success. Tila Tequila, for example, has bad acne, a hair color that looks strange with her too-tan skin tone, and fake breasts. I am content with my clear skin, hair that accents my skin tone, and real, substantial breasts. I will find my success my own way, rather than by showcasing my chest all over, or posing half naked in a reality show looking for “love.” I will get respect for my writing and filmmaking skills, rather than singing shitty electronic music that takes no talent. Fame may be enviable, yes, but what’s not to be envied is how she got there.

  4. “This was a ridiculous sexist manifesto.”
    This was not sexist (advocating the superiority of one sex over another) and only a manifesto in the most narrow sense of the word. Get an education.

    As for your second paragraph you should re-read what I wrote. I’m saying that if we believe in equality and choice, freedom for each and every individual, then we must respect their decisions. I’m also commenting on how a person who is basically a lingerie model gets dumped on by people for doing something most other celebrities do. Hating Tila Tequila says something about you, and how small a person you are. Try arguing my points and not what you want me to have said.

    You’re pretty judgmental for a “girl” with a MySpace titled go-go-gadget-get-me off. I suspect you’re some male sex offender with a fake profile trolling me but on the slim chance you aren’t maybe you should check that profile and look up projection before commenting on “whores” and strippers.

    It’s odd isn’t it that in one post you defend rapists, in another you claim women like Tila Tequila are “asking for it” and the whole time you vomit out your personal story of being raped (and having nice breasts which is information I didn’t want or need) in what is textbook projection. When I told you to get help I really mean it because this is sad. Very sad.

    You’re projecting your self-loathing on to women and trying desperately to find a way to make men non-culpable in abuse. Why?

  5. I suspect I’m being reverse trolled here.
    You’re insane, and I think you’re the one who needs the help.
    Your views of the mind, especially the female one, are far off.
    I’m going to retreat to the safety and intelligence of 4chan’s /b/ forum now.

    I don’t need help,
    I got out of therapy last summer, with flying colors.
    To quote my therapist – “Your view on reality is strikingly in chord, and your opinions are well formed. You are an intelligent girl.”

    Did you just look at the url, or my actual myspace? If you were to actually look, you’d see it’s obvious I’m not a troll.

    I never said girls were asking to be raped or molested, where did I say that? I just said that asking “respect 4 tits?” is stupid. I’ll respect a woman’s decisions, when they’re intelligent.

  6. i agree that this was a great article & your mother raised an amazing man…. its just too bad that you’re defending TILA TEQUILA.

  7. i cant defend perez’s words… but putting paint on your breasts is a little questionable. its suppose to provoke a response and tila is getting just that. Its a cheap shot for publicity and its sad that ppl buy into it but its the reality.

    Perez is famous for the crazy things he says.
    and tila is famous cuz she bought huge tits and plastered them all over myspace.

    its all ridiculous but we all enjoy it.

  8. Wow to Rob and SMP, would you two happen to be on twitter? I’d enjoy following you both. In MY opinion what you to stand for and say (in this entire blog post that is, I’ll admit I haven’t read anything else, yet) is very intelligent in all aspects. 🙂

  9. I think Tila is entertaining. What she was doing was for a good cause and the fact that Perez didn’t mention the context in which the pics were taken was unprofessional and uncool. LOSER!!! However, I do have to disagree with the article’s point. There is a DAMN GOOD REASON for calling some girls whores and sluts….Its cause they are!! Whores get paid (i.e. prostitutes, porn stars and call girls etc.) and sluts are the dumb ones who do it for free! So while the names aren’t compliments, they exist because people bring those titles upon themselves.

  10. I agree with Ellen. And y’all don’t hate! Its called freedom of speech!

  11. This is a very well written piece.

    Loved it.

    And thank you for writing down your point of view!

  12. you are dellusional
    a whore is a whore
    you sell your body
    you are a whore
    that is the word to describe a woman who sells her body
    “whore”
    stop making up stupid excuses to justify your actions whore

  13. doesnt matter
    i didnt even read it all
    its bullshit
    BUTT
    for the first paragraphs you had me fooled
    sound like a bitch dude

  14. Are you retarded? You’re saying the first paragraph where i say that I was raised to not call women whores sounds like it was written by a “bitch” as if you aren’t?

    Men being catty with women are the bitches aren’t they? You’re into Tila like some 13-year-old girl instead of filling your time with what men should (being successful, hunting/fishing, finding a woman) but you’re happy to dwell in perpetual effeminacy and adolescence. You’re the bitch, and any man who gives a crap about Tila’s personal life is as well.

  15. Hi,
    I really enjoyed reading your article. As a woman in this society, I have come across a disturbing amount of men who are heterosexual, but nonetheless really hate women. These men are attracted to a woman on a purely physical level, but regard women as inferior or unworthy of respect. These are the same men who call women “bitches”, “sluts” and “whores” and then watch them in a degrading pornographic movie. These men can’t appreciate a woman beyond their physical appearance or ability to turn them on sexually. Yet at the same time, they resent and are intimidated by a woman’s sexual power over them. I think (and this is just my opinion) that deep down, a lot of this hatred and resentment comes from the fact that misogynists either have had horrible experiences with their mothers or female caretakers growing up and/or they are intimidated by a woman’s sexual power. This sexual power women posess is entirely natural but for thousands of years women have suffered in misogynistic societies. Most religions (that I know of) are deeply misogynistic and teach young boys from an early age about the “evils” of women. Some extreme religions even require women to wear garments to conceal all or most of their bodies. I have a lot more to say about this subject, but I realize this response is rather long…Anyway, thanks for taking the time to read it.

  16. LMFAO!

    You are SO STUPID!

    Do you even know what a whore is???

    Tila Tequila is THE definition of a WHORE!

    Fame whore, sex whore, attention whore!!!

    You feminists must be really proud of this piece of work, right!

    Nothing says empowerment like making porn!!

    And you wonder why there is a backlask on feminism right now?!!!

    Just look at the shit that comes out of your brains~~~!!!!!

    “being a whore is a good thing”…..

    Idiots, all of you!

  17. Actually terms like “fame whore” and “attention whore” are euphemisms that use the word whore to describe someone who literally one. But of course a person would need to be well read and intelligent to know that.

    And please forward this Tila Tequila porn of yours. Only the most prudish Victorian would consider nude modeling pornography but if you have some Tila porn I’m sure many people would enjoy it, and not be angry about it.. I’ll assume you’re a Muslim of some type, and thus sexually stunted.

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